Archive | June 2014

Two girls, One Leather Daddy

One of the missions of The Dark Lair is to give people of color a venue to gain experience presenting on BDSM topics. In that theme a couple of months ago the topic was, “You are the Presenter”. People were encouraged to come and give 10 minute demos on a topic of their choice. To support The Dark Lair, and to lead from example, I offered to do a 10 minute demo on Leather Care. I was inspired to alter a demo I have been working on called, “Lust, Love, Leather: Boots 101” and make it a brief demo touching on the idea of passing on boot blacking and leather care skills, how paying it forward keeps the leather spirit alive. Also, instead of doing the common scene that briefly demonstrated leather care on boots, I wanted to show leather care of a garment… chaps.

The inspiration for the variation of my leather care class came to me from an event that happened a few weeks prior when a friend asked me if I thought it was possible to teach her to care and condition her Daddy’s boots. I told her, that of course I can teach her and she was overjoyed. It turns out that a number of people that she had asked in the past had told her it was impossible for her to do boot blacking, because she is blind. I let her know that the Mid Atlantic Bootblack 2013, Amelia Chan, was blind.  So, when the opportunity arouse to practice a variation of my class, I went and recruited Sir Raven with her chaps and her girl Jade.  I got a chance to speak a little about being leather and what that meant to me. Paying forward what others have shared with me and keeping leather spirit alive. Then there was the spectacular hands on demonstration of Sir Raven, standing with her chaps on, flanked on both sides by girls who were ready to leather up, clean, and condition her leather chaps. It was a good time for all!

Sir Raven felt we had done a good job and said we girls would be rewarded with a trip to Alice’s Tea Cup. I am not so sure that we did such an excellent job on actually cleaning her chaps, but I suspect Sir Raven was just proud of us for being two girls who were willing to get up in front of a group of people and give back to our community.  So, today, two girls got a special treat from an awesome Daddy. Thank you Sir Raven for making me feel valued and special. I appreciate both of you and feel honored to call you friends.


Dark Lair for the Education of People of Color LPN Edition 2014

Dark Lair for the Education of People of Color LPN Edition 2014

Not in order: Sir Raven, Liquid, Deb, Ashley Young, Sara Vibes IMsL 2012, Sir Guy & karida IPE 2013, Master Taino, Cee Jay Mr Eagle 2014. Ramien Pierre 2014,

Taken in the basement of Purple Passion the early afternoon before Leather Pride Night celebrations started at The Eagle NYC

Soft Smiles Association for Submissive Education

My friends Victoria and Zoe have asked me to come lead a conversation about “Exploring Dynamics” on June 14, from 2pm – 5pm at Purple Passion in Manhattan. This is a topic I am well versed on after a year of traveling around NY and the metro area during my International Power Exchange title year. I am looking forward to being there and I hope you come join me!

SSASE is a membership organization with focus on education and social gathering for submissive women. Their workshops follow safe space rules and are geared as women only events. The social events have have information posted when the ladies can bring their +1. You can learn more about SSASE at

The Dark Lair: BDSM Education for People of Color LPN Edition!

A few weeks ago, I contacted C Creane Images about possibly allowing use of their images from the Leather Women – A Photographic Documentary project. I was hoping for a visual display of people of color for The Dark Lair’s meeting the afternoon of Leather Pride Night NYC. Today I got the good news that C. Creane Images will not only be releasing images from her documentary for use at the Dark Lair meeting, but is permitting the images to be auctioned off to raise travel funds for a couple of title holders. Some of the images, that will be available to view and bid on will include, Vi Johnson,  Ramien Pierre, Debrorah Lady D Harrison, Cee Jay, Sir Raven, and yours truly karida! Some of the people whose images will be displayed will be in attendance and I know Mama Vi and several others have offered to sign their photos for whoever bids and wins. This LPN Edition of The Dark Lair will have the presence of many leather title holders including IML 2014 Ramien Pierre, Mr. Eagle NYC 2014 Cee Jay, IMsL 2011 Sara Vibes. IPE 2013 Sir Guy and karida, and the iconic Master Taino. I will be attending both the meeting at The Dark Lair and LPN XXXI.  I’m very excited to see everyone… so much leather in one room at one time! This evening promises to be spectacular.

The Dark Lair will be meeting at Purple Passion located at 211 W 20th St., New York, New York 10011

MAsT Metro NY

On the first Sunday of every month a group called MAsT Metro NY (Masters And slaves Together) meets to explore Master/slave and other power exchange dynamics. Although I do not fit into a M/s structure, power exchange is something I very much desire in my intimate relationship(s). An other expression that some feel is synonymous with power exchange is authority exchange. Plus some, like myself, find appeal in hierarchical relationships. Each meeting customarily has a chosen topic or a special speaker who has a subject of interest that they share their knowledge of with the group. What makes his monthly meeting special in the NYC area is that the focus is on How to do relationships versus How To do XYZ style of “play”.

So, this Sunday I went with my best girlfriend and participated in a lively topic on “Reconciling M/s Structure to Accommodate Change”. It seemed like a timely topic considering the evolving status change in my relationship. The discussion started with how relationships can evolve and moved to how restructuring can be an aid in longevity of relationships. There was a lot of participation from both sides of the slash. One person who is a bit newer to the scene asked about what service was? There were many views of what can constitute service and that generally the types and forms of service are as wide and varied as the types of dynamics that can exist. Then we moved from a round circle discussion to separate groups, dividing Dominants in one space and slaves/subs into their own separate space. These separate safe space circles have always been a favorite of mine and are a unique part of their format.

After the meeting nearly everyone joined up and walked over to a diner to socialize. There we encountered possibly the worst waiter we have had in a long time. He got nearly every order wrong. He then went on the argue with each person who had a wrong order, telling them they were wrong about what they ordered. I think this happened to five people, before I so brilliantly explained to the person who had inquired during the meeting, “What is service?” that “What this waiter is doing, is NOT service!” In spite of the bad service, it was a good Sunday with  my friends at MAsT.